Oct 17 - 46/45 - McCain +01
The Day the Music Died
"Beans. Beans. The musical fruit. The more you eat, the more you toot!"
Don't be so sure. 
The story exposes the havoc caused by the 'anti-social side-effects' of this dietary staple, especially in the developing world, (As if the developing world didn't have enough problems.) and explains how researchers have discovered the key to cutting "the amount of wind-causing compounds" in beans.
To paraphrase a line from the 1993 Spielberg classic, Jurassic Park: "The scientists were so busy trying to figure out if they could, that they never stopped to ask themselves if they should."
In other words, who are we to remove flatulence from God's plan?
According to Dr. Frankie Phillips of the British Dietetic Association, "Despite the obvious social concerns, there is no physiological harm from the flatulence caused by eating beans."
Before they deflower nature's great gift, I suggest that these Venezuelan scientists listen really listen to the classic 'musical fruit' lyric in its entirety:
"Beans. Beans. The musical fruit.
The more you eat, the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel.
So let's eat beans with every meal!"
The story exposes the havoc caused by the 'anti-social side-effects' of this dietary staple, especially in the developing world, (As if the developing world didn't have enough problems.) and explains how researchers have discovered the key to cutting "the amount of wind-causing compounds" in beans.To paraphrase a line from the 1993 Spielberg classic, Jurassic Park: "The scientists were so busy trying to figure out if they could, that they never stopped to ask themselves if they should."
In other words, who are we to remove flatulence from God's plan?
According to Dr. Frankie Phillips of the British Dietetic Association, "Despite the obvious social concerns, there is no physiological harm from the flatulence caused by eating beans."
Before they deflower nature's great gift, I suggest that these Venezuelan scientists listen really listen to the classic 'musical fruit' lyric in its entirety:
"Beans. Beans. The musical fruit.
The more you eat, the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel.
So let's eat beans with every meal!"
Amen.
By Robert - 4/27/2006
8 Comments:
Too low-brow?
What does this have to do with politics? Good question.
In today's hyper-polarized political arena, few people are willing to reach across the aisle.
Maybe the first step to getting people to reach across the aisle to create policy in the best interests of the nation as a whole, is to get people to reach across the aisle to pull one another's fingers.
Am I kidding? Not sure.
Great picture.
I regularly order Mexican food with rice instead of beans becauase I don't feel better after eating them. I would be more inclined to consume this newly engineered bean.
Maybe scraping the bottom a little.
Better get back on those Republicans, we have Canadian politicians following their policies.
ex/ no media coverage of bodies returning from overseas.
On the positive side, the US has been cutting back on CO2 emissions while Canada has been SAYING they will SOMETIME.
Mark,
I been scrapin' bottom in more ways than one lately. (Fart jokes are the high water mark these days.).
Good to hear from you, bro.
Rice and Pinto Beans and frank' red hot sauce..........YUMMMMY!
And in middle age - the GAS is welcome along with the fiber.
Oh MY God! I think this is a "War on Beans"
Falwell, Robertson, Blackwell =====> MOUNT UP
PS, I just made myself sick writing those three names above...
Hey Bob, if the sun comes up and you wake up...just remember >>>thats a good day!
Hey, great idea....lets try to get Congress & The Prez to pull our fingers instead of our wallets
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